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#1 Luthersfaith

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Posted 28 April 2013 - 05:41 AM

Well you know the old saying "money sex and power." I have a little money and little power. And PD Seems to have taken away the sex drive. I am really not content with that. Any suggestions? PS My wife is very patient with me.

"I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world." - Jesus (John 16:33)

#2 Tmj

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Posted 28 April 2013 - 06:12 AM

I am with you. Wife is extremely understanding, but I still feel bad all the same. Sex is the last thing I am interested in. Sex drive was one of the first things that started to soften... Checked for low T, it was fine. I always thought it was because I just turned forty and was somewhat natural. As I have learned, one more thing the PD is screwing with. In fact. I do not really experience pleasure, enjoyment or get upset or depressed. I am as even keeled as they come. I used to be extremely driven and passionate about many things, now I just sort of roll with the punches. It not really apathy or depression but something like it. I have become extremely pragmatic, sort of like Spok from Star-Trek. MDS said this can happen as the brain centers responsible interpreting/recieving chemical inputs as pleasure from dopamine are affected.

I am hopeful that things will start looking up (haha) as med cocktail changes over time.

#3 Luthersfaith

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Posted 28 April 2013 - 06:44 AM

Hokie, What you describe is what I experience too. I've always been kind of a laid-back person, (Well certain things do upset me Still... Like really dumb stupid people Who play head games) But now I am so laidback that it feels like the La-Z-Boy is stuck In The Recline Position!
"I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world." - Jesus (John 16:33)

#4 Tmj

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Posted 28 April 2013 - 06:50 AM

I like the lazy-boy analogy. Great description!

#5 christie

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Posted 28 April 2013 - 07:10 AM

Sex drive? What is that and where can i find it? Gone with the (PD) wind i guess...
Some (lucky?) parkinsonians actually experience increased sexual drive as a side effect of dopaminergic drugs....The rest of us just have to try a little harder (no pun intended !) LOL

-English is not my first language !

-Aged 39. Diagnosed at 35. On levodopa monotherapy (500mg daily).


#6 Luthersfaith

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Posted 28 April 2013 - 07:49 AM

Sex drive? What is that and where can i find it? Gone with the (PD) wind i guess...
Some (lucky?) parkinsonians actually experience increased sexual drive as a side effect of dopaminergic drugs....The rest of us just have to try a little harder (no pun intended !) LOL

I think the PUN Is great!
"I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world." - Jesus (John 16:33)

#7 rapid4b

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Posted 28 April 2013 - 11:58 PM

I feel for you guys and gals. that would really suck! and christie i am one of the people you are talkin about, my carb/levo dose makes my sex drive unquenchable to say the least, luckily my wife doest mind! LOL

#8 KimAgain

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Posted 30 April 2013 - 01:24 AM

Surely it is only a problem, per se, if both the patient and their partner are feeling deprived, or that they are missing out on a level of intimacy they would like to have restored? In which case, I'd suggest a visit to an appropriate health professional for an evaluation and some (hopefully) sound advise.

Failing that, you might try repositioning the recliner... :wub:

Dx 1994, age 45.  DBS surgery, 2009:  Bi-lateral; wires to one battery - on my left side.  500mg Sinemet CR daily.


#9 Joe64Jones

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Posted 30 April 2013 - 06:29 AM

Well, I was diagnosed with low T a couple years ago. My Urologist keeps asking me about my sex drive and I keep telling him, "no change". Now that I have been diagnosed with PD, at least I know why. With all the drugs I am on now, I am considering stopping the Androgel for low T, it's not helping me with anything any way. I do feel really bad for my wife as she has to put up with my "lack of interest". I also like the recliner analagy, I might use that to help others undestand what I'm going through.

#10 Beau's Mom

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Posted 30 April 2013 - 12:22 PM

From a woman's point of view, while my drive may be lessened, my need for touch and tenderness has greatly increased.
Dianne

I am not a human being trying to have a spiritual experience; I am a spiritual being having a (sometimes difficult) human experience.

#11 Sean

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Posted 01 May 2013 - 12:19 PM

Sex drive? What is that and where can i find it? Gone with the (PD) wind i guess...
Some (lucky?) parkinsonians actually experience increased sexual drive as a side effect of dopaminergic drugs....The rest of us just have to try a little harder (no pun intended !) LOL

Thank you, God, that this is one PD related issue that doesn't involve me!

#12 KimAgain

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Posted 02 May 2013 - 02:27 AM

Thank you, God, that this is one PD related issue that doesn't involve me!


YET!! Never say never...

Dx 1994, age 45.  DBS surgery, 2009:  Bi-lateral; wires to one battery - on my left side.  500mg Sinemet CR daily.


#13 Brad24

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Posted 18 June 2013 - 12:31 AM

My experience is tHe same as most of yours. If you are lucky enough to have a patient partner like mine you will find out that the more you don't try anything the more you will not want to do it. This causes frustration. Try whatever you can even if its only spooning, hugging, kissing. In my experience once you do these things the actual act becomes easier and more desirable. The worst thing you can do is withdrawal from your partner. Do what you can to show affection to your partner and things will fall into place. This is all based on my experience. Hope I helped.
DETERMINATION "In the heart of the strong shines a relentless ray of resolve...It cannot be stopped, it cannot be controlled, and it will not fail."

#14 Sister411

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Posted 31 August 2013 - 10:31 PM

I agree Brad. The last thing I want to do at the end of a physically taxing day (everyday), is get more physical. But the act of just holding one another is comforting to both, and since our minds are trying to convince us not to do anything extra because we're "sick", other parts of our bodies are willing and able to get the groove on:)
"She is clothed in strength and dignity and she Laughs without fear of the future". Proverbs 31:25

#15 Luthersfaith

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Posted 01 September 2013 - 05:58 AM

I don't know if the meds are wearing off or what, but, as time goes by, the "urge" is coming back. (Now if only our schedule would improve.)
"I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world." - Jesus (John 16:33)

#16 RNwithPD

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Posted 01 September 2013 - 06:07 PM

I think about it...just don't feel energetic enough most of the time to actually do it.

Kevin

Currently age 42.  Symptomatic at age 36.  Diagnosed at age 39.  Sinemet  25/100 mg 2-tabs every 4 hrs (800-1000mg levodopa daily); carbidopa/levodopa 50/200 mg CR at bedtime; entacapone 200 mg every 4 hrs; Amantadine 100 mg 3 times/dayy; gabapentin 200 mg 2 times/day; gabapentin 400 mg at bedtime; Klonopin 0.5 mg at bedtime; Seroquel 50 mg at bedtime; Effexor 75 mg daily; Vit-D3 5000 IU daily;Vit-B Complex daily; Melatonin 3 mg at bedtime


#17 chelle

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Posted 01 September 2013 - 07:40 PM

I have noticed a change in that I need more of a passionate relationship than I used to. Maybe its in the fear of losing my husband (even though he says he isn't going anywhere) cause of the PD. I think that if it wasent so painful...talking about my legs, hips ect... it would be better. My husband says he knows it hurts me so then he doesn't wanna make it worse. He says he can tell buy the look on my face. Honestly I just wish I could put a pillow over my face so that wouldn't bother him. He says he'd rather me be honest and say I'm hurting than do it out of obligation. How many other partners feel this way??? I love my husband so very much that I'd make it work regardless of my emotions or pain.

#18 sarahjo

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Posted 02 September 2013 - 04:17 AM

chelle, we (my husband and I) went through this faze just recently, I love my husband more than life itself, but honestly I started getting really emotional before during and after,(putting added stress on myself, to act, or be what I thought he wanted, in the bedroom!!!) question what does stress do to us with pd? we hurt more, we stiffen up more etc. therefore we cant even begin to enjoy our partner because we are miserable. I have an amazing man, he tells me I am the queen ? in the bedroom, my way or high way attitude, I am very spoiled in a LOT of ways, due to his patients with me. Mind you I have been with this man since we were 15 years old never have we been with anyone else, I have also had many female issues due to my p.c.o.s., which we found out I had after three miscarriages, and three live births, after my son was born, I was having some really bad pain in my right ovary, (now that I think about it, I have had a lot of issues for a very long time on my right side of my body,) (crazy to just think of this) anyhow, my husband we there when I lost my first baby at almost four months, and we had to do a dnc. not a pretty sight, ( I forgot to mention) my first child Ashley when in delivery we almost lost her and I both, due to complications, so from that point on he really put women on a higher platform, no way worshiping women, but a deeper appreciation for them and what we go through to carry their children, etc. 2 and 1/2 year later was our first loss, and like I said he was there, and it wasn't easy, I went through so much to try and get pregnant, and to loose it due to stress on my body, was not easy to go through, after than loss we had my middle daughter and two more miscarriages, then my son, found out that we had pcos, had my tubes tied cut and burned cause after takin in consideration what the pregnancies were doing to me emotionally, and physically the risk of having more children was to great, (don't get me wrong I believe children are the greatest gift a couple can have, but if you are physically unable to have them and care for them you really think it through, (we have some amazing friends who had to adopt, and they are out of this world parents,) but for me and my husband this was a pivitable time in our intimate relationship. but chelle here's my point for years I went through the motions of doing a duting and making sure my husband was taken care of by damn if another woman was gonna take his interest. He is MINE AND ALL MINE. in 2002 when I had to have the cervical fusion done on c5-6 and the dr. told him I could come out paralyzed from neck down, I saw an a man I never wished I would have to see, I am a giverrrr by nature, I get so much joy out of giving to others, and doing for them, that when the shoe was on the other foot. man my love grew even deeper for my husband, and when things are taking away for a period of time (intimate relationship-SEX part of the relationship) (passionate, crazy, spontaneous etc.) it really made me insecure, it wasn't til this time that I took the intimate part of our relationship for granted. with having female issues all of our married life the drive has been up and its been down, what I am trying to say it this, man I love my husband, and I enjoy being with him we have I think as of right now able to talk about what we both enjoy and need, and you know I like it this way, if your husband is saying he wants to please you then he really means he wants you to be pleased, my husband and I are in our mid 40s now and he is very honest, that some men have higher drives than others, but if I am unhappy then he can't feel like a man taking care of my needs, so I don't know like I said I am very spoiled in this area, when I am hurting he is slow and patient and when I am feeling good, then I try to return the LOVE. LOL truth your husband loves you and married you, do your best and communicate what you are feeling, tell him, what you need, if you don't know let him know sorry honey no promises its a discovery night, take your time and enjoy one another, take your love making, intimate relations, etc, whatever you wanna call it, to another level. exp. one evening its date night (we have one every week and have for 17 years) (sometimes money has been tight and we get a dollar burrito ea. from taco bell go home and lock ourselves in the room, couldn't afford a babysitter) all was good and then I started stiffening up every move was painful and don't know if you know what kuma sutra is but it works, and its fun, my point relax and remember to have fun together. I came to this thought a while back after finding out about my pd, this area in my relationship is the only thing I don't have to share, I have to share my husband with his job, our children, church members, etc. but NO BODY gets to share my time with MY MAN.... just personal experience I hope this helps, Bless you

#19 sarahjo

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Posted 02 September 2013 - 04:42 AM

truth is,I am still trying to learn to always be honest with my husband (yes it is hard at times, because as my husband has shared we over think sometimes) husbands with your wives and wives with your husbands, enjoy one another, other have said, that they only like to cuddle so cuddle and others like the more aggressive approach, then be aggressive, my point, let each other know what you are thinking, do I still mess up at times you bet, and does my pd ever get in the way YES but keep trying its ur time to be SELFISH with one another. HAVE FUN do you remember when you were dating, or when you first got married, wow how passionate you were to please one another, I think that is even for today with pd, the key is take your time and rediscover one another. I was told this along time ago as a suggestion get a little dart board/dice (from dollar store) you both(on separate papers write 10-20 things you enjoy having done to you when you are done, you give your paper to your partner) take turns either rolling the dice or throwing the dart, and what ever your dice equals or number your dart lands on the person that rolls looks on the paper they now have and whatever they have listed you do. (you pick time frame) and then the next person rolls or throws (got the picture). its fun and you will rediscover one another's interest. you never know if you are married as long as I have been you or your partner's taste may have changed. HAVE FUN, let others know some tricks (keep it clean please) that have worked to keep the spark alive, we are not guaranteed tomorrow so lets enjoy today. love you all and bless your relationships. (also you need to swallow your pride and remember you are not the only one that's dealing with this change.) there are some exceptions to the rule for those that are now departed from their partners my heart is so sad for you all but you are a beacon of light for us youngsters that are newly dx. please feel free to give us pointers on how to keep us going.

Edited by sarahjo, 02 September 2013 - 04:58 AM.


#20 chelle

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Posted 02 September 2013 - 07:29 AM

truth is,I am still trying to learn to always be honest with my husband (yes it is hard at times, because as my husband has shared we over think sometimes) husbands with your wives and wives with your husbands, enjoy one another, other have said, that they only like to cuddle so cuddle and others like the more aggressive approach, then be aggressive, my point, let each other know what you are thinking, do I still mess up at times you bet, and does my pd ever get in the way YES but keep trying its ur time to be SELFISH with one another. HAVE FUN do you remember when you were dating, or when you first got married, wow how passionate you were to please one another, I think that is even for today with pd, the key is take your time and rediscover one another. I was told this along time ago as a suggestion get a little dart board/dice (from dollar store) you both(on separate papers write 10-20 things you enjoy having done to you when you are done, you give your paper to your partner) take turns either rolling the dice or throwing the dart, and what ever your dice equals or number your dart lands on the person that rolls looks on the paper they now have and whatever they have listed you do. (you pick time frame) and then the next person rolls or throws (got the picture). its fun and you will rediscover one another's interest. you never know if you are married as long as I have been you or your partner's taste may have changed. HAVE FUN, let others know some tricks (keep it clean please) that have worked to keep the spark alive, we are not guaranteed tomorrow so lets enjoy today. love you all and bless your relationships. (also you need to swallow your pride and remember you are not the only one that's dealing with this change.) there are some exceptions to the rule for those that are now departed from their partners my heart is so sad for you all but you are a beacon of light for us youngsters that are newly dx. please feel free to give us pointers on how to keep us going.


Thanks... I too had complications with child birth. Never lost a child so I have never experienced that pain and pray for those who have. I have been with my husband since 8th grade. We had our first son at 16 and beat the odds of working out. We had our youngest at 19 at which point my tubes were tied due to complications. He was 10 weeks early and I had lost kidney function it came back but they said I'd be on dialysis and due to my faith and prayer all functions came back. Thank God! Our 20's were rough. Trying to become adults and find ourselves and learning to love each other as we changed. Then 30 came and for the first time in my life I became a better person. I no longer live in my old selfish ways. I try not to take things for granted. We too do date nights. Last night my husband said I really miss u when Im not home and I said I miss you too. Which is why I passed up shopping last night to stay home. He said but we didn't do anything. I replied with we didn't have to, we were here together and that was enough. Plus I enjoy just staying home.
That being said... the best way for us to keep things exciting is we stopped saying "u wanna do it". It means more when its spontaneous and not planned.
Hope everyone has a safe Labor Day!




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