i want to bring this up as a topic, because i wonder if i'm the only one in this boat. things were going so bad for me when i was diagnosed, i didn't even care that i had pd. i knew i had it anyway, so having it confirmed was a relief, in some regards, but finding out i could no longer work ( i was 63 when i lost my job because i could no longer do my job ), was worriesome. i had been having symptoms for 10 years. i was a waiter, and at the same place ( with tons of stairs ) for 27 years. my dog ( my dogs are everything to me ) had just died, i lost my job, i had to move out of S.F., and then i got diagnosed. i just felt like: " well, oh sure ". i really didn't care much. i don't feel embarrassed by my symptoms. if i saw someone walking around tripping, stumbling, stuttering (!), head shaking, hands shaking, slack jawed and drooling, i'd look to. they are just curious, and i'm fine with it. not being able to work has created problems, i am older and have physical things that prevent my working, but i lost my savings in the last bust in 2008, and now must live on SSD. what i didn't expect was, they would cancel my SS when i got SSD. maybe i'm stupid, but i thought i would be able to get both, and get by, just. now come march, i will be $1,000 short a month, instead of the $300 which i juggle with now. painfully. difficultly. losing my SS will kill me. i thought with medicare come may when i turn 65, SS, and SSD i would be okay. now, i just have this huge stress ( which make my symptoms worse ) where i do not know what will happen to me financially. i can't be the only one with no funds. i can't even get snap, i just get a bag of food on tuesday nights down the hill ( thank you people at the food bank ! ). how do i not become homeless ? how do i not just give up and die ? i feel that no matter what agency i contact, they just send me off to someone else, none of which has helped. so, that is the problem that p.d. has created for me. can't work, can't live. i feel like i might be forced to take my life, and i don't want to. i'm a pretty happy person, i move oddly, and want to afford to get another dog, but i'm fine w/o vacations, or dinners out. i feel pretty content.....which means i have to kill myself because of money. such a completely stupid reason. i couldn't control what happened to my retirement, and now i can't control this. does anyone have any ideas ? i hope i answered your question about what bothers me about having p.d., only the financial problems that are failing me. thanks, lu
Edited by lu states, 29 November 2013 - 03:40 PM.